Chapter 1 ...Locked up...
The police had taken both me and Sharna down to the station so we could give our statements on what had happened with Leanne. Sharna could hardly talk with what she’d just found out. Leanne confessed to murdering Sharna’s baby father, Jermaine. After they’d taken our details we were allowed to go. I rang Jamahl off my phone. “Where the hell are you Mia? I’m here waiting for you! I’ve got work you know!” he said down the phone to me. “Come and get me please” I said to him. “Why where are you? What’s happened? Are you okay?” he asked me. “Just come and get me please, I’ll explain everything when you get here” I said to him. I told him where I was and he said he’d be here in 15 minutes. I held Sharna as she cried. “I swear, if she EVER gets out of prison I won’t be holding back! I’ll kill her Mia! You know I’m capable of it!” Sharna said into my shoulder. I wanted Leanne to pay for what she did but Sharna had far too much to live for. “Imagine though Sharna, if you were to make her pay, the police would find out! Then what? What’d I tell Alisha about her Mummy?” I said to her. She looked at me. “I DON’T CARE I WANT REVENGE!” she shouted and began to cry even more. Jamahl’s car came around the corner and he got out of the car. I got in the back with Sharna and she cried on me all the way to Grandma’s house. It was round about 10 and Harvey and Holly were fast asleep on Grandma’s sofa. I put them in the car then kissed Grandma goodbye. Sharna had finally calmed down and stopped crying by this point and even smiled from time to time. “It’ll be okay I promise you Sharna” I said to her. “I know, as long as I’ve got family like you, I know it will” she said to me smiling. Jamahl followed me in his car as he’d phoned in to work sick because he wanted to spend time with me and make sure me and Sharna was okay. I still hadn’t told him my news but it didn’t seem the right time to tell him.
Chapter 2 ...Secrets...
I drove to mine and parked my car. “When you telling him?” she asked me. “I don’t know” I replied. She nodded. I walked into the house to find, Mum and Aunty Jamilah sat on the sofa, with half a bottle of rosé lined up to a full one on the coffee table. “What time do you call this?!” she asked me. “Mum don’t start!” I said to her walking back out of the house. Sharna carried Alisha in whilst I carried Holly to bed and Jamahl carried Harvey. I put Holly and Harvey into their pyjamas, after that I put their nightlight on because Holly was scared of the dark, even though Harvey offered to protect her. I closed their bedroom door quietly then went downstairs. “Where’s Dad?” I asked. “Babysitting Shaquille and Nevaeh with Junior and Jordan” Aunty Jamilah replied. Mum looked at me. “What?!” I asked her. “What? Am I not allowed to look at my own daughter no more?” she asked me sarcastically. I rolled my eyes. “DON’T YOU DARE ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME YOUNG LADY!” she shouted at me. I got up and walked out the door slamming it so the letterbox shuck. I heard Jamahl shout after me but I didn’t care I carried on walking and never looked back. He soon caught up with me. “What’s wrong Mia? You haven’t been yourself today, whose upset you?” he asked me looking worried. I told him the story of what happened today and why I was at the prison giving a statement. “WOIII! Leanne’s on some shit!” he said to me. I looked him straight in the eye. “What?” he asked me. “I need to tell you something” I said to him. “What?” he asked me. “I’m pregnant” I said to him. His mouth dropped and then he hugged me. I know he had mixed feelings like I did but then his face lit up. “THAT’S THE BEST NEWS I’VE HAD ALL YEAR!” he said to me. This made my decision all the more hard.
Chapter 3 ...Doomsday...
I got up at around 8am and got ready. I’d come up with a plan in my head. It was selfish but I couldn’t handle a baby. I got to the clinic and I was made to fill out some forms whilst I waited for the doctor. The doctor called my name and I walked in. I sat down on the chair. She asked me loads of questions and I answered them. “Will you erm...you know...be able to see it?” I asked. “No you won’t, it’ll be just like having a period” she said. “If you take this tablet then it’ll start the abortion process” she told me. I sat there staring at the tablet. I eventually took it. I felt so selfish and dirty but I knew there was no turning back now.
...THE NEXT DAY...
I’d just killed my baby and I felt terrible both physically and mentally. I rang Jamahl. “Hello gorgeous” he said. I began to cry. “Mia what’s happened?” he asked me. I told him that I was losing our baby as this seemed a less selfish version of the story to what had actually happened. “Where are you now? How do you know you’re losing the baby?” he asked me. “I went to the hospital and they told me and driving home” I said to him. I hadn’t even told Mum and Dad or Junior or Aunty Jamilah that I was pregnant. The only people that knew I was were Sharna and Jamahl. I parked my car and got out. It was hard to walk because each waft of pain hurt just as much as the first. Dad came back and knocked on the door. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” I shouted at him. He tried the door. “ARE YOU OKAY MIA?” he shouted through my bedroom door. I just lay there, tears falling down my face. I wanted to die. I felt so low, dirty and selfish. “Mia listen to me, if you’re behind this door watch out because I WILL kick it through” he said to me. I got off my bed and walked over to my door then unbolted it. He hugged me. “Who’s hurt you Mia?” he asked me. “Nobody Daddy” I replied. “I’m being serious I’ll kill them! Who’s upset you like this? Was it Jamahl?!” he asked me. I cried on his shoulder. “I’m having a miscarriage” I said looking at him through the tears. He looked shocked, hurt and like he was going to cry himself. Instead of shouting at me like he normally would, he pulled me in for another hug. I cried like I’d never cried before.
Chapter 4 ...Let the games begin...
I cried myself to sleep and went for a nap. I woke up at about 5pm and walked downstairs. Dad was sat on the sofa watching a film. I went and sat next to him on the sofa and laid my head on his chest. He put his arm around me and kissed my hair. “I love you Mia, remember that okay” he said to me. “I love you too Daddy” I replied. He smiled at me. Mum came back from work with Harvey and Holly in tow. Dad still hadn’t told her but I didn’t want Harvey and Holly knowing so I just shut up about it and acted as if nothing was wrong. “What’s wrong Mia?” she asked me. Mum knew when something was wrong with me even if I had the biggest smile on my face she’d know that something was wrong with me. I began to cry and ran up to my room, slamming the door shut. I lay on my bed sobbing my eyes out. I wanted Jamahl so bad but I couldn’t because he was at work. Someone knocked on my bedroom door. I went to see who it was. My brother stood there a stray tear falling from his right eye. I cried into his chest. “It’s okay Mia” he said hugging me. I loved my big brother even if I didn’t admit to it. After we’d talked for a while I decided to get ready and go to Sharna’s with Junior as Mum had gone there to speak to Aunty Jamilah. “I’ll catch you up sis” he said to me. I walked out the door and waited for him at the gate. I looked down the road and saw a guy lean in to kiss a girl. As my eyes focused more, I realized who it was. Jamahl and Sharna.
Chapter 5 ...Let the games begin...
“YOU FUCKING SKET!” I shouted running towards them. I ran up to her and grabbed her hair and ragged it back. “GET OFF ME YOU SLAG!” she shouted back at me. I pounced on her and started punching her. I didn’t care if she was my cousin at the moment she’d betrayed me. Junior ran up and got me off her. “MIA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” he said to me. “SHE WAS LIPSING UP JAMAHL!” I shouted. Sharna got up and charged for me just as Mum and Aunty Jamilah came outside her house. “DON’T FUCK WITH ME YOU LITTLE BITCH! YOU MAY BE PREGNANT BUT YOUR FACE ISN’T!” she said punching me in my jaw. “FUCK YOU YA TRAITOR!” I said getting free and punching her. Mum got me off of her whilst Aunty Jamilah retained Sharna. I looked at her. She had cuts on her face from where my rings had pierced her skin. I charged for her again but Mum held me back. “I’D FUCKING KILL YOU IF I WASN’T KILLING YOUR YOUTE TOO! FUCK YOU MIA! HE KISSED ME I DIDN’T EVEN KISS HIM!” she screamed at me. Aunty Jamilah looked shocked. I looked back at Mum and she was just looking at me. Junior snapped and swung for Jamahl. “YOU WANNA FUCK MY SISTER? GET HER PREGNANT THEN GET ONIT WITH MY COUSIN YEAH?!” he shouted at Jamahl. Mum calmed him down. I looked at Jamahl. He couldn’t even look me in the eye like a real man. I broke free and charged for him. I punched him in his jaw and he hit me back. He hit me so hard I fell. “SHE’S FUCKING PREGNANT YOU FOOL!” Sharna shouted at him helping me up. “GET OFF ME! I HATE YOU! AND I LOST THAT FUCKING BABY THIS MORNING!” I shouted at her. Jamahl looked at me. I ran home and Junior ran after me. I opened the door and went into my room. I closed my bedroom door and went for my wardrobe. I tipped out all the things which were on top shelf of my wardrobe, everything, the bags, shoes, scarves. I finally saw it. I hadn’t even needed it since I was 15 but I didn’t care about anything or anyone anymore. I put the blade to my arm. Junior ran into my room and looked at me. “Mia don’t do it” he said to me. I looked at him then at the knife. I put the knife to my wrist. “MIA STOP IT! I’LL FOLLOW YOU!” he said to me. Mum came running into my room but stopped when she saw the blade on my wrist. I looked at her. I saw the fear in her eyes. “Mia drop it” she said to me. “WHY! I’VE GOT NOTHING TO LIVE FOR ANYMORE!” I shouted back at her. “Me and your Dad need you” she said to me. “WHY?! NOBODY NEEDS ME!” I shouted at her. “I’m pregnant” Mum told me.
Chapter 6 ...Family matters...
I dropped the blade on the floor and she came and hugged me. I cried into her shoulder. She cried too. Dad took Junior downstairs to calm him down. “I love you Mia, don’t EVER think about harming yourself again sweetheart, I want you to be able to meet your little brother or sister not me having to tell them about you” she said leaving the room and going into my bathroom. “Keep it on the down low though babe, don’t even tell your Aunty Jamilah okay” she said coming back into my room with the first aid kit. I nodded. She looked at the knife on the floor before starting to clean my face up. “Promise me you won’t do it again Mia! You’re my first daughter, I’d have died inside if I lost you babe! I don’t even class you as my daughter. You’re more like a best friend to me Mia” she said to me. I hugged her. It was true because she did have her moments where she acted like a best friend to me but she was always there to make sure I was okay and protect me. She sat me down on my bed. “Why didn’t you tell me you was pregnant sweetheart? I could have helped you” she said to me. I shook my head and began to cry again. “Oh Mia” she said sympathetically. I felt another strike of pain rip through my stomach. “Mummy it hurts” I said in pain. I squeezed Mums hand. “It’ll all be over soon Mia” she said hugging me tightly. I wanted to tell her the truth but I knew she wouldn’t understand if I told her. Mum left me to do what I was doing but she’d come and check on me every now and then. I lay on my bed, just thinking about stuff. There was a knock at my bedroom door. I went to go see who it was.
Chapter 7 ...Holly and Harvey...
Holly stood there smiling at me. She hugged me. “What’s that for?” I asked her. “For being my big sister! I love you Mia” she said to me. I smiled at her. “I love you too Holly” I said to her. I went into her and Harvey’s room with her and we watched one of her favourite DVDs. “Err! I don’t want to get married! Boys are stupid!” she said. I laughed at her. “Not a bad idea kid! Not a bad idea! No but Holly seriously, I don’t want you messing with boys until you’re 16 okay?” I said to her. “That’s old!” she said to me. “So what am I?” I asked her. “Ancient” she said to me, a cheeky smile on her face. I started to tickle her. “I’ll show you ancient!” I replied tickling her. She laughed so hard she went red. “Somebody’s got a ketchup face!” I said to her. “Ketchups disgusting!” she said to me. Harvey came in the room and sat next to me. I started to tickle him too. “MIA STOP IT!” he said to me. “No! I’m in evil big sister mode!” I said back to him. Junior came into the room and started tickling me. “OH YEAH! WELL I’M IN EVIL BIG BROTHER MODE!” he said tickling me. I loved my brothers and my sister. They could cheer me up no matter how bad my day had been. Whilst Harvey and Junior put the beds together for our sibling sleepover, me and Holly went downstairs to get the supplies. I walked into the living room to find Mum and Dad kissing on the sofa. “ERRR!” Holly shouted at them. Dad moved away from Mum as quick as Holly could blink. I walked into the kitchen and Holly followed me. We got 4 bowls out and Holly put two scoops of ice cream into hers and Harvey and then 3 scoops into mine and Juniors. We got the sauce out from the cupboard. She squeezed a drop on each of them then topped them off with sprinkles. We then grabbed a big bag of sensations from the cupboard, 4 Ribena’s, some Haribo and big bar of chocolate. We somehow managed to carry them upstairs. The boys had made us a very nice cotch for the night. Holly fell asleep half way through the film, Harvey soon after that. We put them to bed and carried the bowls and empty cartons/packets downstairs. We washed up and then went to sit with Mum and Dad in the living room. I then got ready for bed and went to sleep.
Chapter 8 ...2 months later...
I got the twins ready and decided to take them to school as Mum had a bad case of morning sickness. I got them in the car and went back inside to get their packed lunch boxes from the kitchen. I got into the driver’s seat and started the car up. I drove down the road and passed Sharna’s. I still hadn’t spoken to her since we’d fallen out. I knocked on the door as I was taking Shaquille to school too. Nobody came to the door so I decided to ring the house phone. I heard the answering machine kick in. I decided to just let it go and drive the twins to school. I walked them across the road, watched them run around in the playground for a little then walked back to my car. I had 5 missed calls from Mum. I rang her back. She was so hysterical. I drove home as fast as I could. I walked into the house. “MUM! Where are you Mum?” I shouted. I followed the sound of the crying. It led me to the dining room. She sat there tears streaming down her face, and the home phone on the kitchen table. “Mum what’s wrong?” I said to her. She looked at me. “Mia sit down” she said to me. I sat down on the kitchen chair next to her. “There’s been an accident sweetheart” she said. It then hit me that nobody answered the door when I went to Sharna’s so they must have all been at the hospital. I looked at her. “What accident?” I asked her. “Alisha, she’s in hospital” she said to me.
Chapter 9 ...Tragedy brings everybody closer...
I ran back to my car and drove to the hospital with Mum in the passenger seat. “Slow down” she said to me. I didn’t care. My goddaughter was fighting for her life. I got to the hospital and they told us where to go. I walked into the waiting room to find Sharna sobbing on Aunty Jamilah. I went over and Sharna got up. “I’m sorry Sharna” I said to her. “I’m sorry too Mia” she replied. I hugged her so tight and she hugged me back. I’d missed her so much. I sat down next to her. I held her hand as she sobbed in the seat next to me. I wanted to make everything okay. A doctor walked in. “She’s going to be okay, but she will need to stay in hospital for a few days” he said to us. “Thank you” Sharna replied smiling. “I knew she was going to be okay, she’s a fighter” I said to Sharna. She smiled at me.
...TWO WEEKS LATER...
Me and Mum walked to Sharna’s to see how Alisha was as she’d only come out of hospital two days ago. I knocked on the door and Aunty Jamilah answered it. “Hello you two” she said to us stepping aside to let us in. “What was so urgent?” she asked Mum. “Mia go and find Sharna I need to talk to your Aunty alone for a second” she said. “You’re scaring me....tell me” Aunty Jamilah said to Mum sitting on the sofa. Mum went and sat next to her. I went upstairs to find Sharna in her room with Alisha safely asleep in her cot. Sharna was sat on her bed on her laptop. It was definitely one of her ‘lazy days’ today. She had her hair up on top of her head, her glasses on and no makeup on her face. She was wearing grey tracksuit bottoms and a white vest top. I walked into her room and sat on her bed. We spoke about what happened with Jamahl and the baby I’d secretly aborted. I cried a bit and she wiped away my tears. Alisha woke up and we took her downstairs. We went downstairs to find Aunty Jamilah hugging Mum tightly. I then realised that she’d finally told Aunty Jamilah.
Chapter 10 ...Not you again...
Uncle Jordan came back and Mum told him her good news. “So that’s why Jason’s been chirpy recently” he said to her. She nodded. It got to about 11 and me and Mum decided to go home. “Ring me as soon as you get in” Sharna said to me. “Alright, I love you cuzzy” I said to her. “I know I know!” she said to me hugging me. Aunty Jamilah kissed my cheek. “Look after her!” she said to me. “I will” I said to her. I linked my arm in Mums and we walked back to ours. I’d never seen her so happy in all of her life. I saw a woman walk into our front garden then I heard shouting. “SHE AIN’T HERE! YOU BETTER LEAVE HER ALONE!” I heard Dad shout. Aunty Jamilah came up to us from nowhere. “What’s happening?” she asked. Mum shrugged her shoulders and charged up to ours. We ran after her. “Mum leave it, let me sort it” I shouted after her. “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?! ROUND 2?!” Mum shouted to the mystery visitor. As I got up to the fence I realized who it was. Mums half sister Natasha who she didn’t even know about until a few months ago. “TY! Calm down” Aunty Jamilah said to Mum. “Yeah when I’ve done this bitch over, I’LL CALM DOWN THEN!” Mum shouted at Natasha taking her earrings out. I knew Mum would do it. “Oh yeah?” Natasha said back to Mum storming up to her. She hit Mum. Dad came and restrained Mum from retaliating. I pounced on Natasha. Punching her, kicking her and head butting her. Anything I could to hurt her. She grabbed my hair and pulled it like a bitch. She somehow got on top of me and started punching me. “DON’T FUCK WITH MY FAMILY YOU DUTTY BITCH!” Sharna said running up the road. She grabbed Natasha’s hair and dragged her off of me. We then tag teamed to mash her up. “LLOW YOU!” she shouted at us both. “NO LLOW YOU! DON’T FUCK WITH A BITCH WHO’S GOT NOTHING TO DO INIT!” Sharna screamed back at her. I was still fighting her when Sharna got me off her. “DON’T YOU DARE COME NEAR MY MUM OR MY FAMILY AGAIN INIT! I WILL KILL YOUR CLART!” I screamed at her. “I didn’t want any trouble! I only came up here to tell her Dad was in hospital!” she said to me.
Chapter 11 ...I see you’re back...
It’d been a month exactly since Granddad died. Mum never really cried over him and to be honest I didn’t blame her for it because of the things he told Natasha about her. I didn’t know whether she was just putting on a brave face or whether she actually genuinely didn’t care. She always had a smile on her face when I came back from college. I came home today to find Mum sat at the kitchen table on her laptop. “Someone’s upstairs waiting for you sweetheart” she said. I looked puzzled. “Go!” she said to me a smile on her face. I ran upstairs and opened my bedroom door. I couldn’t believe it. There was a teddy bear, bigger than me sat on my bed. It was a light brown colour, with a gold bow around its neck. “MUM! WHY’S THERE A GIGANTIC BEAR ON MY BED?!” I shouted down the stairs. “Come here a second” she said. I walked down the stairs. “He left this too” she said handing me an envelope. “Who did?” I asked her. “Open it and you’ll find out won’t you” she said smiling at me. I opened it to find a card with a lonely looking teddy bear on the front and “I’m sorry” in big bold letters across the top. I opened the card and it said:
Dear Mia,
I’m so sorry for hurting you like that baby. I miss you so much and I’m trying to move on but I can’t. I love you too much to let you go. I’ll understand if you never want to speak to me again because I know I was a prick for hurting you in the first place. Thank you for even reading this as I’m not even worth wasting your time.
I love you,
xxx
I handed it Mum to read. “Mia he loves you! He told me that himself! Do you really think I’d let him in this house if I knew he didn’t mean it? He came and spoke to me and your dad like an adult” she said. “Yeah but Mum he IS an adult” I said to her. “Well you get my point...anyway he’s coming over soon...and you WILL talk to him Mia” she said.
Chapter 12 ...I’ve missed you...
I sat on my bed with my laptop. I put some music on and started to do my coursework. I put the music on low enough so I could hear when Jamahl arrived. There was a knock at the door and Mum went to answer it. “Hello darling...she’s upstairs” she said. “Okay thanks again Tyla” he said to her. “Don’t mention it sweetheart! Just don’t do it again or I’ll have to hurt you” she said. “I won’t, promise” he said. I heard footsteps on the stairs. He knocked on the door. “Come in” I said. He walked in my room. “I’m sorry baby” he said to me. He began to cry. I ran up to him and jumped in his arms kissing him. “I love you too baby” I said. I put my legs around him and we kissed passionately. He was just a silly boy who made a silly mistake. I knew he was the one and we had to make this work. I turned my laptop off and walked downstairs holding his hand. Mum was sat on the sofa watching telly. She looked at us and smiled. I didn’t know what I was going to do about Sharna. She wouldn’t feel the same around him. Jamahl sat down on the sofa and I lay on top of him.
...4 MONTHS LATER...
I woke up to find Jamahl smiling at me. “I love you” he said kissing me. “I love you too baby” I said kissing him back. “What times your Mum and Dad coming back?” he asked. “I don’t know but they’ll ring me” I replied. Mum had my little sister Ellie last night and obviously Dad stayed with them both. I hadn’t met Ellie yet as I had to stay and look after the twins with Junior but Mum sent us both a picture of her and she was gorgeous. She had dark brown hair and hazel eyes. I got up out of my bed and started to tidy the house with Junior. Sharna still didn’t know I was back with Jamahl. My Facebook status was still single, he wasn’t in my MSN name, he never came round when she was here and Mum kept her mouth closed about us. I was hovering the landing when I got a text from Dad. “Be home for 4. Hope you’re all okay. Daddy x” I looked at the clock and it was 3pm. Junior got the twins ready whilst I finished the hovering off before getting ready. I heard the door open and Dads voice. “MUMMY!” Harvey shouted. I knew they were back. I finished getting ready and went downstairs. Jamahl was holding Ellie whilst Mum watched him. I went and sat next to him and he passed my new baby sister to me. “You’re a natural Mia” Mum said without thinking. I wanted to breakdown and cry but I knew I had to keep my cool as not to ruin the moment. After a while I couldn’t contain myself so I went upstairs, and began to cry on my bed. There was a knock on my bedroom door and Mum walked in.
Chapter 13 ...Engagement...
I broke down as she hugged me. “What’s the matter sweetheart?” she asked me. “My little boy or girl would of have been born around the same time as Ellie” I said to her, tears streaming down my face. “Mia sweetheart, it just wasn’t meant to be” she said hugging me tighter. I wanted to tell her but I knew this was something I had to take with me to my grave. Nobody in my family believed in abortions. I knew I couldn’t cope with a baby at my age. I knew I just couldn’t. I’m not as strong as Mum or Aunty Jamilah was or even Sharna is. Mum calmed me down and led me back downstairs. I walked in to find Junior, Jamahl and Dad having a conversation. However, it stopped as soon as I walked into the room. Jamahl stood up. “Tyla can I have a word with you in private please?” he asked Mum. “Why? What’s going on? I don’t trust boys!” she said looking at them all. “Ty, just go” Dad said smiling at her. It’s like they could read each other’s minds because she walked into the kitchen and Jamahl walked in after her and then Jamahl closed the kitchen door. Dad made me sit next to him so I couldn’t hear what they were talking about. “What’s going on?” I asked Dad. “Nothing sweetheart” he said holding Ellie. I looked at Junior and he looked back at me smiling. I knew something was going on. “Stop being so paranoid!” he said laughing at me. “It’s kind of hard when everybody in this house is talking about me!” I shouted at him. “Calm down Mia!” Dad said to me. I sighed and walked back upstairs. I sat on my bed and Jamahl walked in. “Your Mum said will you go shop for her please” he said to me. “Why can’t she come ask me herself?” I asked in a strop. “She’s busy feeding Ellie” he replied. I did as I was told and went downstairs. “Make sure you wear a coat missy! It’s chilly out!” Mum said to me. “Yeah” I grumbled back to her. I went into the kitchen to get my coat from the rack next to the back door. I put my hand in my right pocket to get my glove on and stuck it on my right hand. I then put my hand in my left pocket. I felt something really strange. I got it out. “Come here!” Mum shouted into the living room. Dad and Junior walked in with Jamahl behind them. He walked up to me and got down on one knee. “Marry me Mia?” he asked me.
Chapter 14 ...Bloods thicker than water...
“OF COURSE I’LL BLOODY MARRY YOU BABY!” I shouted at him jumping on him. I kissed him like I’d never kissed him before. Mum began to cry. “I’m so happy for you two!” she said to me. Jamahl went back home to tell his Mum the good news. It had hit 11pm and I still wasn’t tired so I decided to hop onto Facebook for a few hours. I logged on and I had one relationship request. It said “Jamahl Macintosh has enlisted you as his fiancé. Please can you confirm that you are engaged?” I hit the confirm button without remembering who I had on Facebook. I had one new notification. “Oh shit” I said to myself. We had a full blown argument over the status and this is what it said:
Sharna Hayden
You forgetting what he did to us? You wouldn’t speak to me for TIME!
5 minutes ago · delete
Mia Johnson
He’s a changed man. He’s not like that anymore
4 minutes ago · delete
Sharna Hayden
YEYEYEYEYE WHATEVER MIA!
2 minutes ago · delete
Mia Johnson
Grow up. Please, just grow up.
A minute ago · delete
Sharna Hayden
Me grow up?! You’re the one who can’t see how stupid she’s being. He’ll only hurt you again.
35 seconds ago · delete
Mia Johnson
No he won’t! If you haven’t got anything nice to say then don’t say ANYTHING at all. I’ve got nothing more to say to you so goodbye.
13 seconds ago · delete
I logged out of my Facebook and slammed my laptop on the floor. Tears began to stream down my face. What was I supposed to do? Choose him over her? Or her over him? I cried myself to sleep that night.
Chapter 15 ...Jealousy...
It had been 2 months since Jamahl and me got back together. However, Mum hadn’t spoken to Aunty Jamilah or Sharna or Uncle Jordan in all that time because they all had separate views. I didn’t care though. Me and Jamahl were stronger than ever and it showed. About a month ago I came home from work to find him in my room. He’d decorated it with rose petals and everything. It was Valentine’s Day so it was a bit clique but I didn’t care. Dad had taken Mum out and Junior had taken Harvey, Holly and Ellie to visit Grandma Reynolds so we had the house to ourselves. We decided to make the most of it. After a heated session in my bed, I got ready for bed whilst Jamahl made us both a meal. We ate it in my room whilst watching Titanic. After I’d finished my food I took the plates downstairs. I then went back up and fell asleep on him. I woke up the next morning and heard raised voices downstairs. I went to the top of my stairs and Jamahl was sat on the bottom step. “What’s going off?” I asked him. “Mia we need to speak” he said to me. I looked at him and he looked back deep in my eyes. He got up and walked up the stairs, took my hand and led me into my bedroom. He looked at me. “Mia, it’s not that I don’t love you, I just think it would be better if we were friends...look at all this drama we’ve caused!” he said to me. “I don’t care I love you!” I shouted at him beginning to cry. “You’ll always be in my heart Mia just we can’t be together, I don’t want you falling out with your family just because I made a stupid mistake” he said to me. I could see where he was coming from but I didn’t want to leave him, I loved him too much. I took the engagement ring off and put it in his hand. “Keep it baby....maybe one day we can be together but just not today, I love you forever Mia” he said placing the ring into my hand. He kissed my forehead and walked out of my bedroom door.
Chapter 16 ...Wrong place, wrong time...
“WAIT!” I shouted after him. He turned round and I gave him one last kiss. He kissed me so passionately and I know I did the same back. I wanted to hold him forever but I knew it would just cause arguments. I walked behind him down the stairs and out the front door. He got in his car. I couldn’t just let him go. “I LOVE YOU” I screamed at him. He looked at me and a stray tear flowed down his cheek. He mouthed the words ‘I love you’ and drove off. I stormed back into the house. Mum was sat holding Ellie, Dad next to her. Aunty Jamilah was sat on the other sofa with Sharna. “I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL!” I screamed at them tears streaming down my face. “What’s happened Mia?” Mum asked me. “THAT’S FUCKING HAPPEND!” I said slamming my engagement ring on the coffee table. “I don’t follow” she said. “Right Mum, because of all you lot arguing, he woke up, walked downstairs and heard you all shouting at each other! Then now he’s left me because he feels that he’s pulling me away from my family! I’d rather be with him but he doesn’t want that!” I shouted at them all. Junior came downstairs, half awake and half dressed. “What’s up Mia?” he asked me. “FUCK YOU ALL!” I screamed. I stormed upstairs. Three hours had passed since the argument when I heard the door knock. “MIA COME HERE!” Mum shouted up the stairs. I walked downstairs to find two police officers sat there on the sofa. I’m guessing Dad and Junior had taken Harvey, Holly and Ellie out somewhere because they were nowhere in sight. “What have I done now?” I asked one of them. “Nothing, but you might want to sit down for this” they replied. “What’s happened?” I asked. “I’m afraid there’s been an accident” they said. “What accident?” I asked confused. “I’m afraid Mr Macintosh was involved in an accident along the M1, we’re sorry to say but he’s no longer with us” they said.
Chapter 17 ...The next day...
I cried myself to sleep last night. I wanted to get him back but I knew that I couldn’t. I blamed my family for what happened to him because if it wasn’t for all their arguments then he wouldn’t have needed to be on the roads at that time. I got showered then put my grey tracksuit bottoms on with a black top. I didn’t even feel like doing my hair or my makeup. I didn’t care I just wanted Jamahl back. I wanted to hear his voice again. I wanted to feel his touch again. I knew I wouldn’t get him back no matter how much I tried. I walked downstairs to find Mum with Aunty Jamilah sat on the sofa. I looked at them both and they looked back at me. “I’m so sorry Mia” Aunty Jamilah said to me. “Save it, it won’t bring him back now will it” I snapped back. “Don’t speak to your Aunty like that Mia” Mum said to me. “Oh whatever Mum” I said to her. “Excuse me!” Mum said getting up. “What?” I said standing there. She sat back down. “COME ON THEN! HIT ME MUM DO IT! JUST DO IT!” I screamed at her. She got up to do it but Aunty Jamilah stopped her. Junior came running downstairs. “TAKE YOUR SISTER UPSTAIRS BEFORE I KILL HER!” Mum shouted to Junior looking at me. “Mia come on!” he said to me. “ABOUT YOU’LL KILL ME MUM! I HATE YOU ALL! IF IT WASN’T FOR YOU ALL ARGUING THEN JAMAHL WOULDN’T HAVE LEFT ME! HE WOULD STILL MOST PROBABLY BE HERE!” I shouted at them all starting to cry. Junior tried hugging me. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” I screamed at him. I ran up to my room, put my Ugg boots on, grabbed my phone, purse and car keys and ran back downstairs and out the front door. “And where do you think you’re going?!” Mum shouted out after me. “SOMEWHERE WHERE I CAN BE CLOSE TO JAMAHL AND I HOPE YOU’RE ALL HAPPY!” I screamed at her. I got in my car and sped off. After what had seemed like hours of driving I reached my destination. I walked up the path and knocked on the door. Tears fell down my cheek as the woman hugged me.
Chapter 18 ...I miss you...
Jamahl’s Mum led me into the kitchen. She was being so strong about all of this. I just wanted to stay with her as she knew what Jamahl did was wrong but she also knew how much I loved him. “He wouldn’t want you to cry Mia” she said to me. “I know, I just miss him so much it’s my fault he’s gone Lisa! I love him so much” I said crying. She reached across the table and held my hand. After we’d spoken a little she rang Mum to tell her I was okay. After that we went up to Jamahl’s room so we could feel a little closer to him. I walked in his room and it was clean to say it was a guys room. He had pictures of me and him all over his room. I saw one of his jumpers on his bed. I ran up to it and smelt it. It smelt just like he always did. It smelt of Lynx. I smelt it and began to cry. “Mia you can have anything you want from in here if it makes you feel better” Lisa said to me. I took his jumper and a few photographs of me and him. I went back downstairs and had a proper heart to heart with Lisa. “How’s Jade coping?” I asked. Jade was Jamahl’s 17 year old little sister. “She doesn’t know, she’s on holiday at the moment and I don’t want to spoil it for her” Lisa said, a stray tear falling down her cheek. I got up and hugged her. “You were the best thing that happened to him Mia” she said to me. “He never stopped talking about you, he loved you so much” Lisa said. After a while I decided to set off back to Birmingham. “Keep in touch sweetheart” she said hugging me. “Don’t worry I will” I replied. I drove back to Birmingham, placing some flowers where Jamahl died on the way. I parked my car on the drive and got out. It had gone 1am so I was guessing nobody would have been awake. I used my phone light to guide me up the stairs and into my room. I got showered and into my pyjamas. I lay on my bed looking at the teddy bear Jamahl got me. Tears started to fall down my face.
Chapter 19 ...Missing...
It had been a month and 3 weeks since Jamahl’s funeral and nobody had seen Jade since. Lisa was worrying so much about her as Jade never even rang her Mum to tell her where she was. Jade never even rang her best friend to tell her where she was or where she was going. I wanted things to be right again but I knew no amount of wishing could change what had happened. It got to about 6 when I decided to get ready and put some fresh pyjamas on as I still didn’t feel very well. I sat in my room in darkness when the phone home phone went off. “Hello.....” I said. “Mia its Sharna” Sharna said. “What do you want?” I asked her. “To talk obviously, just talk to me please Mia” she said. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” I said slamming the home phone down back on the base. It was all her fault why he was dead. I hated her with a passion and nothing could change that. My phone started to ring and I went to answer it. “SHARNA GO AWAY!” I shouted down it. “It’s not Sharna....” the voice said. “Oh, sorry, who is this?” I asked. “It’s Jade” she said. “Where you bin babe? Your Mum is worried to death about you!” I said to her. “In Leicester” she said. “Why are though there? How did you even get there babe?” I said. “It doesn’t matter” she said. She began to cry. “Babe, stay there okay I’m coming to get you and you can come back to mine and sort yourself out” I said. “See you soon Mia and thank you” she said locking off the phone. I pulled a jumper dress on over my pyjamas and put my boots on. “Back soon, M xx” I wrote on a piece of paper and left it on the coffee table. I got into my car and drove to where Jade said she was. I spotted a girl arguing with some guy. I realized it was Jade. “LEAVE HER ALONE!” I said getting out of the car. “Who the fuck are you?” he said stepping to me. “MIA! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?! JADE GET IN THE CAR!” I shouted. Jade did as I said. “She’s a sket anyway!” he said to me. “You want to say that again?” I said stepping to him. He realized I wasn’t scared of him and that I would fight him in front of every single spectator who was stood around watching us argue. “Sorry innit” he said walking off. “Eediat!” I shouted getting back into my car. Jade looked at me. “Thank you Mia” she said. “Anytime sweetheart” I said to her smiling. I wiped away her tears with my sleeve. “Where are we going then? Home or back to mine?” I asked her. “Home...but I’m scared” she said. “Why sweetheart? Your Mum will shout but it’s because she cares about you” I said to her. She nodded and we set off back to hers.
Chapter 20 ...A little part of you still lives on...
I held Jades hand and knocked on the door. “If she shouts, its natural okay, she just cares a lot for you!” I reminded her. She nodded. Lisa appeared from her bedroom window. Jade looked up at her Mum. “WAIT THERE!” she said closing her window. Lisa opened the door and held Jade so tightly. She walked her to the kitchen table and I walked in after them closing the front door. “Thank you so much Mia!” Lisa said smiling at me. I smiled back at her. I was driving back to mine when I started to feel nauseous. I pulled over by the side of the road and started being sick. “No I can’t be....” I said to myself. I drove to the 24 hour Asda. It was about 12am so nobody would have been in there anyway. I found what I wanted and paid for them. I then sped home, opened the door and ran upstairs. “What time do you call this?” Mum asked. “Mum leave me alone for 10 minutes okay!” I said smiling at her from the top of the stairs. “What’s going on Mia?” she asked me. “Just don’t come in my room or my bathroom for 10 minutes, thanks mate” I shouted down the stairs. I then ran into my bedroom, locked the door and turned the light on in my bathroom. I opened the box up and took the pregnancy test out. I did as it said with the 3 different tests I brought times two. Each one took a different period of time to come up with a result. I had to wait between 3 and 7 minutes for the whole of them to be done. I went back in my room and turned my laptop on. I watched the 7 minutes go by and went back into my bedroom. My face dropped as I read the first test. “I’m sorry baby” I said as if Jamahl was there with me. I then looked down on the rest of them. The other two types said I was pregnant, as well as the same type that said negative. Tears began to stream down my face. “I knew you wouldn’t leave me all together Jamahl” I said. I went and sat down on my bed. There was a knock on my bedroom door and I went to open it. “What’s wrong?” she asked me. “Erm, nothing Mum” I said smiling at her. “Why are you so happy young lady?” she said looking at me funny. “I finally found something that’s going to make my life worth living for” I said hugging her.
THE END.
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